Coming Home to What I’ve Always Known

An Awakening Through the Layers of Kate

For so much of my life, I’ve been on a journey of remembering. Though for a long time, it didn’t feel like remembering—it felt like seeking. Seeking answers, healing, freedom, purpose. Trying to understand myself, my body, and how my life was unfolding.

I’ve spent years doing the deep inner work. Healing. Exploring the mind-body connection. Learning how the body reflects what’s happening within. Navigating physical pain and understanding it as a reflection of suppressed emotions, limiting beliefs, and stories I carried. I explored shadow work, peeling back layer after layer to accept the parts of myself I once rejected. Every step, I was opening more space. Creating more room for truth to arise.

But I didn’t realise then where it was all leading.

Recently, something shifted. Not in the way we often expect spiritual awakenings to arrive—some grand, lightning-bolt moment—but as a quiet, undeniable knowing.

A deep awareness settled over me like a soft blanket, and in it, I remembered:

I am not Kate.

I am the awareness witnessing Kate.

The consciousness within me—the presence I’ve always sensed but never quite grasped—is the one watching Kate’s life unfold. It’s the one that sees her body, her thoughts, her emotions, her experiences.

And in this realisation, I saw clearly:

Kate’s desires, experiences, joys, and even her pain are the way consciousness explores this human life. Without Kate, consciousness couldn’t feel the warmth during hot yoga, the embrace of her children, or the beauty of human love. It couldn’t taste, touch, or cry.

Kate is the vessel through which consciousness gets to experience it all.

And so, I cried.

Deep, soul-releasing tears.

Tears for the Kate I’ve been carrying, loving, fixing, and healing. Tears for how loved she is by consciousness itself.

For how sacred this life is—this human life I thought I was trying to fix or perfect.

I realised the weight I’d been holding. The 'idea' of control. The belief that I had to do all of this on my own. And suddenly, it wasn’t mine to hold anymore.

Life Feels Different Now

After this realisation, I’ve noticed a quietness in how I experience the world. The thoughts still arise, but I watch them without needing to become them. Emotions come, but I no longer identify with them in the same way. There’s a spaciousness that feels both new and ancient at the same time.

And yes, there’s been discomfort in this too. The ego—the part of Kate that believed she was running the show—sometimes resists this newness. It’s strange to live without the constant buzz of identification. It can feel like a loss… but it’s not. It’s a settling. A coming home. I’m not lost. I’m found in the truth of what I am. And I’m letting myself adjust to this slower, more present way of being.

Living as Awareness in the Human World

I still show up in life as Kate. I still work as a conference manager and this intuitive, mind body practitioner still engage with people who are living from their own ego identities, and I do so with compassion, not judgment.

But something fundamental has shifted. I don’t feel the need to prove or strive the way I once did. I no longer carry the same urgency or pressure. I respond to life from presence rather than from fear or habit.

And it’s easier now.

Softer.

This awareness moves through Kate’s life—not erasing it, but making it lighter. I still navigate tasks and responsibilities, but I do so from the space of being, not doing for the sake of identity.

The Ripple Is Real

Something beautiful is happening as I rest here.

My partner has begun his own deepening of awareness—organically, without me pushing. People who follow me online are sharing their own awakenings and reflections. Not because I’m doing anything different, but because presence speaks. Awareness wakes itself up through itself.

And when you live from this space, those who are ready to remember find you.

This Is What I’ve Been Asking For My Whole Life

I’ve surrendered to it.

It’s not flashy.

It’s not complicated.

It’s a quiet coming home to what’s always been true.

And from here, I allow life to move me.

No force.

No rush.

Just presence.

And for the first time, that’s more than enough.

If You’re Feeling This Too…

If something in you is stirring, or if you’re sensing there’s more beyond the mind’s ideas of who you are—you’re not alone. I’m here.

And whether you’re ready to explore this or just sit quietly in your own awareness, I honour your journey.